Musings of a snake's life...

I know how a snake must feel. Slithering around all snake-like, doing your snake thing, living your snake life, not bothering anyone-just minding your own snake business. Then you have one too many rabbits for your current size, or sit in the sun for 3 hours and 58 minutes too long, and your skin has had it. Realizing that you are stuck in skin that is too small and too tight, you have to shed a layer... you have to, you can't help it, the skin has got to go. Then its a HUGE irritation and you rub and scratch and slither and glide etc. etc. against branches and rocks and door frames and whatever else that happens to be handy to help that old, dried-up, gross skin come off to make way for the new, beautiful skin underneath. I bet its during this time that most snake attacks happen. I mean you're at your worst-all flakey and nasty, and super irritated cause you itch and itch and you just want to get rid of the itch....stop the itch...stop the itch... oh the insanity.......-and someone comes along and gets all up in your face, I'd bite 'em too. Ok, well I might not bite them, but I would give them the evil eye at the very least and probably say something sarcastic, that is if I could think of something sarcastic to say (I always seem to think of the best come backs and zingers hours after the immediate need, and then when I do come up with something I reduce them to tears and expose them for the lame brains they are..... in my head). So, a word to the wise, if you don't want to get attacked by a snake: "Don't tease them while they're peeling!"